Saturday, September 17, 2005

ScrappleFace: HUD Unveils New Orleans Housing Concept
As part of a White House PR offensive to refute charges that President George Bush doesn't care about poor black people, the Department of Housing and Urban Development (HUD) today unveiled a plan for rebuilding public housing in New Orleans that will ensure near-total evacuation of low-income residents in advance of future emergencies. An artist's rendering of the proposed new public housing complex shows what appears to be a vast train yard, with thousands of Amtrak cars refitted as charming family residences. At the end of each column of railcar-homes, the sketch shows several engines. "When the evacuation order comes," an unnamed HUD spokesman said, "the conductor hollers 'All aboard'. People get into their homes, and off we go." The HUD source said the idea was proposed by Mr. Bush himself. "Since the president takes the blame when people ignore evacuation orders, we're making it tougher to ignore them," said the spokesman. "Now, if you want to stay, that's fine...but your home is going to Chicago." Amtrak is a quasi-governmental agency whose mission is to transport taxpayer dollars out of federal coffers to an undisclosed location.

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