City Councilman Unearths Magical Zoning Amulet

Mystery Reader sends this post from The Onion that just about says it all about zoning. I just got back from the American Political Science Association annual meeting in Washington, DC, which is why I haven't been posting. There were 7000 people waiting to use about six computers. I'm co-charing the urban politics sections panels for next year's conference in Philadelphia. Think there will be one on homeowner associations? Book it.

ROCHESTER, NY—After years spent poring over mysterious and arcane plat sheets and deciphering long-forgotten building codes, city councilmember Mike LaMere unearthed the mysterious City Zoning Amulet Friday. "Behold!" LaMere said, holding aloft the solid-gold amulet, which is emblazoned with the Ever-Evaluating Eye of Surr-Vey, Lord Of Demarcation, He Who Measures And Assesses. "With this sigil, the power of zoning comes. Through me, the power of zoning flows! All will behold my power, and I shall bow to no man when designating matter-of-right developments for major retail and office spaces to a maximum lot occupancy of 75 percent for residential use!"