Darwin Award Nominee?
A Lee's Summit man nearly drowned Monday morning while trying to recover his keys at Longview Lake. The Missouri Water Patrol gave the following account: The man, 54, used a garden hose as a breathing tube and jumped into the lake with a rope and a 20-pound anchor tied to his waist. He went underwater once and came up without the keys. He went down a second time, lost the garden hose and ran out of breath. A person on the surface realized something was wrong and pulled the man out with the rope. The victim was unresponsive for a short time but began breathing on his own. He refused medical treatment.


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Some details are missing from this account. First, did he refuse treatment for anoxia or no-brain syndrome? Second, has he filed his lawsuit yet? The garden hose company, the manufacturer of the "anchor," whatever that was, the HOA if a private lake or municipality if public, the rescuer...did I leave anybody out?